Key events
51mins: Jack Grealish is going off, which seems early, perhaps a little knock? Oscar Bobb is on.
We don’t have an answer on the Dyche issue, but here’s a nice story from Tom Williams:
The Sean Deisshhh/Dyke issue reminds me of when I met Mark Gatiss on a train in to south Wales. I said to him in the bar carriage (now sadly gone on First Great Western!): “Excuse me, are you Mark Gay-tiss?” He congratulated me on the audacity of pronouncing the first syllable of his first name correctly, as many opt for ‘Gat-iss’. I thought he might be going down to watch Newport County in action, but apparently he was off to film Dr Who. Likely story.
Peeeeep! Peeeep!
Second half is underway at the Etihad (and most other places).
![Everton's Jordan Pickford](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/26e23e1ed30a5f4001b5ba39e397f9d5f118d3da/0_121_3258_1955/master/3258.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
Query for the readers from Phil Woolf:
I’m currently laid up with post-Christmas flu and enjoying the Everton shindig. Do you or any of the readers know why does every single commentator mispronounce Sean Dyche’s surname? He has gone on record as it’s pronounced “Dike”, so why all this sibilant pussyfooting around with “Deischhh” and the likes?
I had no idea it wasn’t “Deischhh”. Anyone else?
National Leaue half-time scores
Barnet 0-0 Southend United
Bromley 2-1 Ebbsfleet United
Kidderminster Harriers 1-2 Boreham Wood
Oldham Athletic 1-0 Hartlepool United
Scottish half-time scores
Scottish Premiership
Aberdeen 0-1 St Mirren
Hearts 0-0 Ross County
Kilmarnock 0-1 Dundee
Motherwell 3-1 Livingston
Scottish Championship
Ayr United 1-2 Dunfermline
Inverness Caledonian Thistle 0-0 Greenock Morton
Queen’s Park 1-0 Airdrieonians
Raith Rovers 1-0 Arbroath
Scottish League One
Edinburgh City 0-5 Hamilton Academical
Falkirk 4-0 Stirling Albion
Montrose 1-1 Cove Rangers
Queen of the South 1-1 Annan Athletic
Sottish League Two
Clyde 0-1 Stenhousemuir
Elgin City 1-0 Peterhead
Forfar Athletic 0-0 East Fife
Premier League half-time scores
Aston Villa 2-1 Burnley
Crystal Palace 2-1 Brentford
Manchester City 1-0 Sheffield United
Wolves 1-0 Everton
![Crystal Palace's Michael Olise scores their first goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/93fa91a6230f086a6503e24551f17bc2d9c966f7/0_169_4323_2594/master/4323.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
Half-time: Manchester City 1-0 Sheffield United
Rodri’s strike is the difference at the break.
![odri of Manchester City celebrates scoring the 1-0 goal during the English Premier League soccer match between Manchester City and Sheffield United](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/035cd1d6b9043b3f7ed6e426d1c63bf0358f8ade/0_168_5383_3231/master/5383.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
44min: Rare chance for United as William Osula sees his goalbound effort blocked by Manuel Akanji and turned behind for a corner.
Goal! Aston Villa 2-1 Burnley (Diaby 42)
Watkins sprints in behind the Burnley backline and get to the byline to pull it back for Diaby. There’s a VAR check for offside against Watkins but he is well on.
![Moussa Diaby of Aston Villa scores a goal to make it 2-1.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/67b7fa92f5dbc7b9f7c9f9abab15a08b86be0d1c/0_193_5477_3286/master/5477.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
Goal! Crystal Palace 2-1 Brentford (Eze 39)
The turnaround is complete! Jean-Philippe Mateta fails to control a pass on the edge of the area but Eberechi Eze is running in behind him to collect and slot the ball home.
![Crystal Palace's Eberechi Eze celebrates scoring their second goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/ca93f299a8058744a0bc0b1ffc412943290e0c62/0_261_5264_3160/master/5264.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
We have a VAR check at Villa Park where Burnley have the ball in the net. Lyle Foster finishes well, but he is very narrowly offside.
Kevin Wilson poses an interesting question via email:
So if Palace replace Hodgson with Cooper, presumably to play a ‘better’ brand of football, with how many games left will they reappoint Hodgson when they’re genuinely in relegation danger?
This is the Selhurst Park purgatory, I’m fairly sure that Steve Parish is trying to clone Roy Hodgson to continue this cycle until the end of time.
Goal! Aston Villa 1-1 Burnley (Amdouni 31)
Well, well, well… the home side’s lead lasted barely three minutes at Villa Park as Zeki Amdouni converts from close-range after Burnley pump a set-piece from near halfway into the box.
![Zeki Amdouni of Burnley celebrates scoring a goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/3533eefe98bd6503490423f6c0f7b74e9f8ae11d/0_210_5030_3017/master/5030.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
Goal! Aston Villa 1-0 Burnley (Baily 28)
Ollie Watkins makes this, picking up the ball on the left and driving into the box before sliding it to Leon Bailey. The winger’s effort takes a deflection but rifles into the roof of the net.
![Leon Bailey of Aston Villa celebrates after scoring their team’s first goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/995650a2ee0420f859fabc36edaa36fbd774c242/89_0_4327_2596/master/4327.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
Goal! Wolves 1-0 Everton (Kilman 25)
Tough on Jordan Pickford who does amazingly well to save Craig Dawson’s initial close-range effort as a dangerous cross comes in from the right, but Kilman is there to bundle in from the rebound.
![Wolverhampton Wanderers’ Max Kilman scores their first goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/4b4aa31602623ec624260ab87a9e459034e30202/0_114_4283_2569/master/4283.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
![Max Kilman of Wolverhampton Wanderers holds up the shirt of Mario Lemina of Wolverhampton Wanderers after scoring their sides first goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/2b7e6a26822e63bd38eb2bc255db0988f1aea9e4/20_309_3131_1879/master/3131.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
23min: This won’t be a huge surprise but City have 85% possesion in the last 10 minutes.
21min: Chance for Bernardo Silva as he gets slipped in but from a tight angle on the edge of the six-yard box his shot is saved by Wes Foderingham away for a corner.
![Close but no cigar: Manchester City's Bernardo Silva has his shot saved by Sheffield United's Wes Foderingham.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/4b8a9f7df44564b87aab3c5cc1b2bdea1fee648b/0_93_2393_1435/master/2393.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
No goals yet at Station Park where Forfar take on East Fife, but Livingstone are trailing 2-0 at Motherwell in the Scottish Premiership.
Goal! Manchester City 1-0 Sheffield United (Rodri, 14)
Is there a more important player for City than Rodri? The midfielder gets on the scoresheet again with a trademark surging run. No United player gets anywhere near the Spaniard and he’s able to poke the ball home from just inside the box. Too easy.
![Manchester City’s midfielder Rodri celebrates after scoring the opening goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/447b18e888c72f57d85bd5b7ef3f0a4d3a717270/2440_379_2790_3486/master/2790.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
Goal! Crystal Palace 1-1 Brentford (Olise 14)
The dangerman strikes back for Palace! Michael Olise gets on the end of Jordan Ayew’s cross to stab home at the back post to end any hopes of me securing a 100% record with my predictions.
![Hold on to that shirt: Palace’s Michael Olise scores their first goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/dfbd2850bbb7733f9fb478bff61f5690ad7a360e/0_115_3066_1840/master/3066.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
![Palace’s Michael Olise scores their first goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/6dc413316057b31f42c963c2b8d54981b51ad57d/0_165_4341_2605/master/4341.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
11min: City are camped in the Blades’ half but not really creating anything. Chris Wilder’s side are camped deep and soaking up the pressure well. In short, nothing is happening.
Few early goals in Scotland. In the Scottish Championship, Dunfermline are 2-0 up at Ayr United, in League One it is Falkirk 1-0 Stirling Albion and Montrose 1-0 Cove Rangers.
Goal! Crystal Palace 0-1 Brentford (Lewis-Potter, 2)
After a VAR check that took longer than the game had been alive, we do have the first Premier League goal of the day. If that is it for the scoring my prediction will be on the mark. I can’t see it happening, to be honest.
![Keane Lewis-Potter scores.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/9ec3a147cf70cc6230717f78fd92ea0cdc2d598d/0_90_2700_1620/master/2700.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
![Brentford’s Keane Lewis-Potter celebrates scoring their first goal.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/274c71477b8dcd433f012a99886f622db18057ef/0_75_2245_1347/master/2245.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
4min: Not a lot going on at the Etihad to be honest. Slight scare for Ederson as he grabs an aimless and nearly carries it into his own net.
We have an early goal at Selhurst Park, or do we? Keane Lewis-Potter thinks he has Brentford ahead but we have a lengthy VAR check for offside going on. More on that as we get it.
Peeeeeep!
We are underway!
![A rare collection: The Emirates FA Cup, English Premier League, UEFA Champions League, UEFA Super Cup and FIFA Club World Cup trophies are displayed.](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/b5358a3f73f9e7a40d41c8ab9caf7b7a22970650/108_330_5582_3349/master/5582.jpg?width=465&dpr=1&s=none)
Follow-up from Jeff:
I thought of Brighton when I wrote previous email. It has mixed results for them… Need very talented players to succeed at it.
I guess it comes down to your definition of success? I would say both Villa and Brighton are currently both enjoying life.
Predictions time…
Time to make myself look a fool, but here we go:
Aston Villa 3-0 Burnley
Crystal Palace 0-1 Brentford
Manchester City 4-0 Sheffield United
Wolves 1-1 Everton
I’ll revisit these at full-time if I’m correct, otherwise we’ll pretend it never happened.
Proper football email from Jeff Sax:
Last time Villa played they shipped three goals which were due to mistakes while passing out from the back. When is this nonsense going to stop?
I’m a Brighton fan, Jeff, so I hope never.
Not sure what this has to do with this afternoon’s football, but it has been dominating my doom scrolls so I’ll share. So, it’s easy to laugh at US sports culture with its dull chants, ‘world champions’ and Todd Boehly but when it comes to celebrating adverts Americans are unparalleled. Here is a Pop-Tart mascot celebrating its own death while being slowly lowered into a giant toaster at the end of a college football game, because sponsorship. As far as I’m aware, West Brom’s ‘Boiler Man’ never exploded on live TV so this is now my favourite mascot moment of all time. Anyone care to raise it?
Because I failed so miserably to preview the action north of the border, Simon McMahon has emailed in a handy guide:
In Scotland, Celtic are currently leading 2-1, but hanging on, against 10-man Rangers with just a few minutes left. Later, it’s Aberdeen v St. Mirren and Hearts v Ross County. In the Scottish Championship, Dundee United beat Partick Thistle 3-0 at Tannadice last night to move to within two points of leaders Raith, who host Arbroath today. In Scottish League Two, it’s the one clockwatchers have been waiting all year for, Forfar v East Fife. A nine goal thriller perhaps…?
I simply cannot believe I overlooked Forfar v East Fife on the fixture list. Old Firmers can get the last of the action here:
He’s got his lid done for the big day too:
If you are not across what is going on at Kenilworth Road then I would suggest checking in with Rob Smyth’s MBM:
The BIG news from that lot is that Kevin De Bruyne is back on the bench for City, because they are a down-on-their-luck club in need of a break.
Wolves v Everton
Wolves: Jose Sa, Kilman, Dawson, Gomes, Nelson Semedo, Joao Gomes, Doyle, Ait Nouri, Hwang, Sarabia, Matheus Cunha. Subs: Doherty, Santiago Bueno, Traore, Pedro Neto, Hugo Bueno, Kalajdzic, Bentley, Bellegarde, Hodge.
Everton: Pickford, Patterson, Keane, Tarkowski, Branthwaite, Mykolenko, Harrison, Garner, Onana, McNeil, Calvert-Lewin. Subs: Danjuma, Virginia, Beto, Andre Gomes, Godfrey, Coleman, Chermiti, Hunt, Dobbin.
Manchester City v Sheffield United
Manchester City: Ederson, Walker, Akanji, Ake, Gvardiol, Kovacic, Rodri, Bernardo Silva, Foden, Grealish, Alvarez. Subs: Dias, Phillips, De Bruyne, Ortega, Gomez, Matheus Luiz, Bobb, Lewis, Hamilton.
Sheffield United: Foderingham, Baldock, Robinson, Trusty, Bogle, Vinicius Souza, Norwood, Thomas, Ben Slimane, Brooks, Osula. Subs: Adam Davies, Brewster, McBurnie, Archer, Traore, Osborn, Larouci, Norrington-Davies, Seriki.
Crystal Palace v Brentford
Crystal Palace: Henderson, Clyne, Andersen, Guehi, Mitchell, Lerma, Richards, Eze, Olise, Mateta, Ayew. Subs: Tomkins, Matheus Franca, Schlupp, Hughes, Edouard, Ahamada, Matthews, Riedewald, Ozoh.
Brentford: Flekken, Jorgensen, Collins, Pinnock, Roerslev, Jensen, Norgaard, Janelt, Ghoddos, Lewis-Potter, Wissa. Subs: Maupay, Onyeka, Strakosha, Damsgaard, Peart-Harris, Yarmolyuk, Olakigbe, Brierley, Adedokun.
Aston Villa v Burnley
Aston Villa: Martinez, Konsa, Diego Carlos, Lenglet, Alex Moreno, Bailey, McGinn, Douglas Luiz, Ramsey, Diaby, Watkins. Subs: Torres, Chambers, Zaniolo, Duran, Dendoncker, Marschall, Iroegbunam, Proctor.
Burnley: Trafford, Vitinho, O’Shea, Beyer, Taylor, Odobert, Berge, Brownhill, Gudmundsson, Foster, Amdouni. Subs: Rodriguez, Roberts, Redmond, Ramsey, Ndayishimiye, Bruun Larsen, Delcroix, Obafemi, Muric.
Who is ready for some team news? Well, I am…
Preamble
It’s not quite ‘new year, new me’ yet, so bust out what’s left of the Quality Street or the remainder of the biscuit selection and strap in for the last Premier League clockwatch of 2023.
We had a full slate of EFL games last night so it is really all about the top flight today. Manchester City v Sheffield United feels like a foregone conclusion and so – to a degree – does Aston Villa v Burnley. Wolves v Everton is more interesting than that fixture has any right to be, a meeting of two smart coaches with upward looking teams – therefore it is sure to be a dud. While Crystal Palace v Brentford is very much a ‘should we be worried about…’ derby. I am not really selling this well, am I?
Do not worry, I will also be sprinkling in a bit of Fitba and some National League to spice things up.
Who’s ready?